腐国第一毒舌:王 · 傲娇· 尔德

“为什么我会和这样一些人生活在同一个时代?”

作为作家和艺术家,王尔德是毋庸置疑的旷世天才。然而说他的傲娇在腐国历史上排名第二,恐怕也没人敢排第一。


他说:为什么我会和这样一些人生活在同一个时代 真是傲娇得不要不要滴……




1.1881年,王尔德坐船横跨大洋来到美利坚合众国,进关的时候傲然对海关官员翻了个白眼说:“我没什么可以申报的,除了我的才华。” 


I have nothing to declare except my genius.


2.如今段子手们还在玩的梗,是他100多年前玩剩下的:“我年轻时以为金钱是世界上最重要的东西,等到老了才知道,原来真的是这样。”


When I was young, I used to think that money was the most important thing in life, now that I am old, I know it is.

3.他对自己的恃才傲物从不掩饰:“我简直太聪明了,有时连我自己都不知道自己在说什么。”


I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I’m saying. 

4.“我整个早上都在校对自己的一首诗,我去掉了一个逗号。下午我又把它加上去了。”


I was working on the proof of one of my poems all morning, and took out a comma. In the afternoon I put it back again.


5.他嘲讽庸俗的大众:“公众惊人地宽容:他们可以原谅一切,除了天才。” 


The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius.

6.他不相信爱情:“人生就是一件蠢事追着另一件蠢事而来,而爱情则是两个蠢东西追来追去。”


Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other.


7.他也不相信婚姻:“两个人离婚的最主要原因是什么?”“结婚。”


What is the chief cause of divorce? Marriage. 


8.他嘲讽悲观主义者:“借钱就要向悲观主义者借,因为他们不会期待你还钱。”


Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

9.他嘲讽好为人师者:“对于建议,你唯一能做的就是把它送给别人,建议从来就不是给自己准备的。”


The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.


10.他嘲讽教育:教育是一件可敬的事,但要时刻牢记,没有什么值得知道的事是教得会的。 


Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.


11.他嘲讽自以为是的人:“只有浅薄的人才会说他们了解自己。”


Only the shallow know themselves.

12.他连优秀的人也要嘲讽:“一个优秀的人没有敌人,但他的朋友也没有一个喜欢他。”


An excellent man; he has no enemies; and none of his friends like him.


13.他嘲讽美国:“美国是唯一一个直接从野蛮进入颓废、中间没有经过文明阶段的社会。”


America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.

14.他也嘲讽他的同胞:“我们爱尔兰人太诗意以至不能做诗人,我们的国家里充满才华横溢的失败者,可我们是自希腊人以来最会说空话的民族。”


We Irish are too poetical to be poets; we are a nation of brilliant failures, but we are the greatest talkers since the Greeks.

15.他嘲讽时代:“死亡和庸俗是十九世纪仅有的无法用巧辩逃避的东西。”


Death and vulgarity are the only two facts in the nineteenth century that one cannot explain away.


16.他嘲讽大众的判断:“每次人们赞同我的时候,我都觉得自己一定错了。”


Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.


17.他把嘲讽当成一种习惯:“只有无聊的人才会把早餐吃出花样来。”


Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast.


18.我们都生活在阴沟里,但总有人仰望星空。


We are all in the gutter,but some of us are looking at the stars.


经反复验证,第18句确实出自王·傲娇·尔德之口,无误。